Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
Those nachos came to me in a dream
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
Randomize
