My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
Randomize
