return my video game
Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
I walked in on you eating olive oil off of a plate. you gave me this look and I just started crying. we were that drunk.
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
Oh god it's open bar.
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
Randomize
