I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
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