At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
I bought you a small gift as a preemptive apology for being a drunken slut tonight.
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
Randomize
