Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
Also there's so much vodka on my breath that if I blew on my fingers my nail polish would fall right off
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
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