I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
you were carrying around a glass of vodka telling everyone it was Russian water
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
You're always adorable, but when you're drunk, you're like Chia Pet adorable.
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
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