areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
on todays agenda: meeting with a life coach then going to the dollar store to buy batteries for my vibrator. clearly im still unemployed.
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
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