I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
Why is there a mildly painful bruise on my back?
You slipped off the sink last night.
Why was I on the sink......?
;)
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
Randomize
