Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
we found you in the kitchen at five am trying to make a vodka omelette. you said you didn't want to live in a world where your two favourite things couldn't be together.
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
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