ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
Randomize
