I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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