he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
it’s not easy to sexualize brunch. work with me, babe.
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
Randomize
