with your own penis?
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
Randomize
