Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
Just had a girl agree to give me a blowjob in exchange for wearing my jacket during class. Talk about successful negotiations. Best day of my life
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
Wow, I just woke up in this conference with the woman beside me staring at me. This is what happens when hungover people sit in warm rooms...
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
Randomize
