You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
Randomize
