I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
Randomize
