Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
I am never going on a blind date ever again. He drank way too much and kept telling me I had a nice boob. Like.. Singular. What's the other one? The ugly twin?
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
UPS just delivered me 30lbs of dried cherries... I shouldn't be allowed online when I take painkillers.
I just sucked dick on a ferry
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