My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
I woke up with a russian doll attached to my necklace and a post-it note with "keep babushka safe" written on it. Fuck vodka
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
So hungover. Have a black eye from where I tried to brush my teeth and stabbed myself in the eye instead. Should make the performance review I was stress drinking about go so much better.
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
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