I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
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