i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
After you passed out we took your car to the campus and stole a 150lb plaque that's now in your trunk. Happy birthday!
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
Randomize