Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
the chips you spilled whiskey on is not the same thing as Irish breakfast potatoes
I know it basically makes me the worst feminist ever, but I don't want to kill my own spiders. And I will pay my personal spider hit man with sammiches and unlimited , uninhibited access to my vagina.
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
I just had the polyamorous Canadian hockey player do the splits while naked in a handstand at my apartment just now. And yes, I know it’s 1:30am on a Thursday.
Randomize
