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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
Morning! Got your 3am VM to remind you to get up for spin class and also confirm you were not murdered by the sketchy guy at brunch yesterday. So this is your literal and metaphorical wake up call.
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
Randomize
