i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
When my kids ask how I lost my virginity Im going to have to tell them of a mythical thing called "Myspace" and how strangers could lure you into their "den of love" thanks to clever quotes and graphics
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
I was so proud to be driving sober that I wanted to get pulled over so I could tell the officer I hadn't been drinking.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
Jumanji is 1000% better stoned while cooking breakfast.
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
Randomize