i woke up this morning in my bathroom,naked, with my boxers around my face and puke and shit on the floor and wondering why i didn't have a toenail on my one big toe.
compared to you, a hobo is quite responsible.
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
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