U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
I know it was you because you're the only person I know who gets drunk and craves soup.
Soup is delicious
Dude you have to come get or im gonna nail this 64 y/o woman as repayment for buying me shots of jager
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
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