ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
Randomize
