someone is gonna have my baby tonight. they just dont know it yet
I'll alert the authorities
If she catches me sniffing the seat of her office chair again, she's either going to fire me or fuck me
the best part about being a teacher is there are always 20 little kids around me to blame my farts on
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
Randomize
