you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
i dont even know how to be here
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
Maybe they'll dismiss me from jury duty after they smell beer on me. You can't keep me in a cage and then give me an hour and a half long lunch break next to a beer fest and expect sobriety.
So vagazzling was a success
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