PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
My wife just tried to justify to me why she wants to bring a girl into bed with us. I should win an academy award for my face and response of 'well of its what you need.'
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
Randomize
