Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
Guy in the room next to us in the ER is chanting "I'm jeff and I'm drunk". He's trying to get released to finish tailgating for the Iowa game that starts in 9 hours.
Hungover/still slightly drunk at work. Opened a bag of cheese with a box cutter. Pretty sure I need stitches.
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
Someone snapchat me a pic of you topless laying on the bar with Scotty pouring a bottle of tequila down your throat. IT'S NOT EVEN ELEVEN YET.
School starts next week
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
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