what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
It's never too late to be topless.
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
When you wake up, I have a unicorn coloring book, crayons, mini cupcakes, and booze.
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
So, random question. How much should you tip a Lyft driver when you realized you've fucked his sister? Asking for a friend.
Randomize
