You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
Life Goals: never under any circumstances, pee in an elevator again. No matter how drunk
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
Randomize
