Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
Apparently I used ziplock bags to smuggle my drink out with. By pouring it in one, then cut the corner like it was an icing bag later that night. What is wrong with me?
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
I chugged vodka from a 15 ft snorkel. What the fuck did you do with your life today?
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
I woke up to a gigantic ft-long tootsie roll and a note by drunk me with the words "you're welcome"
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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