i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
Be still, my beating vagina.
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
I just read through our messages from yesterday and realized we both referred to me tearing my penis as a good thing. What the fuck.
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
I just found a grey hair. On my nipple. Fuck you too, Mother Nature.
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
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