Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
How many fucks given?
0.12846
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
He could only go see Deadpool without his girl if he was black-out drunk... because spoilers. They're the perfect couple.
Randomize
