He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
Apparently I send drunk snapchats a lot and they always have random dudes in them. Like one night it was just me and some guy I don't know sitting on my couch.
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
