Whatcha textin bout Willis?
I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
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