Your dad touched me again.
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
He texted me for a bootycall at 2:00am so I rolled outta bed and shaved my legs but then he decided he wasn't coming over...he lost his bootycall privileges
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
you can't tell me you didn't shit your pants I saw them in the trash can by the bathroom.
She asked if I wanted to "Mormon Motorboat" her, which I guess is just motor-boating her through her cloths. Turns out I did.
...I can smell the alcohol on your breath through that text
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
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