i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
She had YOLO tattooed on her ass. Like, one cheek said YO, the other said LO. Even I can't handle that level of hot mess.
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
I think I just received the most dignified proposition of my life. From the father of the bride. Who'd have thought.
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
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