Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
I just spent 10 min explaining to my mom how orange is a strange color. I think she knows
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
Can I chase this vodka with an onion?
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
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