Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
At first I was confused when I woke up with shards of glass and pickle brine in my pants. But then I remembered I hung out with you last night.
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
God, you're like boner-b-gone
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
I know he'd never cheat on me. It'd be like choosing Mexican tap water over Patron.
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
Randomize
