I passed out in the cab. Woke up to the cabby yelling SIR SIR WE ARE AT THE TRAIN STATION!! SIRRRR!!
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
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