He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
Haha so apparently that girl last thought I was you the whole time, and in the morning realized you weren't the one she fucked. Thanks for your help.
I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
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