Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
My biology professor just used the phrase "dick fairy" in a sentence. No, it didn't make more sense in context.
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
Woke up behind one of the fraternity brothers houses in the grass wearing a guinness hat and aviators hugging a 30 rack box with a zonie on my chest next to a campfire.
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Randomize
