would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
You insisted we help some homeless guy put up posters for his missing pet alligator so we left you there because they were really just Chinese takeout menus.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
I told him I liked how shrimp feels in my mouth, but I don't actually like eating it. Turned out to be the most awkward way to say that I wanted to suck his dick.
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
I just passed a lady driving with a cat in a sweater sitting on her lap with its paws on the steering wheel
Only you....
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
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