just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
Walking out of the bathroom and not knowing you have hand soap on the front of your pants so it looks like you blew a load on yourself really sets the tone for the rest of the week...
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
Randomize
