U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
Two word: claymation porn. Think about it.
I don't think I can ever express my appreciation for the things you text me.
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
Randomize
