Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
Waking up next to a guy you don't remember going home with and the first thing you say is: where is my tiara? = successful birthday
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
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