Three words: puerto rican gang bang
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
after you threw up, you tried to prove you were sober by reading the ingredients off the shampoo bottles
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
Woke up with a lip tattoo that says "fake news" in case you're wondering about my wellbeing
You have to commit to sexting. You can't just quit right after I send you pictures of my asshole.
Seriously, come on.
I feel like there's a picture of my ass on the internet right now.
I hate you.
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Randomize
