school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
Do you know how hard it is to masturbate with a runny nose?
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
THIS MOTHERFUCKING ROOSTER
IT KEEPS CHASING ME BACK IN THE HOUSE
FUCK THIS BIRD
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
Randomize
